Jesus' Bitter Cup of Death

From Gethsemane to Golgotha Jesus has been, for the most part, “silent." In Mark’s account, he has revealed nothing of his private thought or his personal feeling. … His spirit has been mute. … the mind is hidden in mystery.
“But … finally, on Golgotha, comes a spontaneous gesture, and with it an insight into the spirit of the Savior … what he’s been doing in the solitude of his interior self.”
He’s lying on his back, wearing nothing but a loin cloth. His head and hands have been placed on the crossbeam to which his hands will be fastened with spikes. The command to drive the spikes through his hands has been given.
“So then a woman rushes over and kneels by the figure of Jesus and offers him a drink.” She’s doing what her people have done, mercifully, for generations. She’s obeying the command of the ancient Proverb, “Give strong drink to the dying, and wine to those in bitter distress; let them drink and remember their misery no more.” She is “seeking to ease the torment of the crucifixion. She’s offering Jesus myrrh, a narcotic.
“And here is the gesture, revelation, the mind of the dying Christ:
“He shakes his head. He will not drink from her cup. He will in no wise dull his senses or ease the pain.
“And so we know. What are the feelings? What has the spirit of Jesus been doing since Gethsemane? Why, suffering. With a pure and willful consciousness, terribly sensitive to every thorn and cut and scornful slur: suffering. This he has chosen. This he is attending to with every nerve of his being – not for some perverted love of pain. He hates the pain. But for a supernal love of us, that pain might be transfigured, forever.
What “has the Lord been doing since Gethsemane? Drinking. Not from the woman’s narcotic cup, but from the cup the father would not remove from him: drinking. Swallow by swallow, tasting the hell therein, not tossing it down in a hurry: ‘So that by the grace of God he might taste death for every one.’”
What “has the Lamb been doing since Gethsemane? Bearing our griefs. Carrying our sorrows. By the stripes he is truly and intensely receiving, healing us all.”

Walter Wangerin, Jr. Reliving the Passion